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BAKU -KONO AKUMU O KURAI TAMAE- (獏--此ノ悪夢ヲ喰ライ賜ヘ-) Lyrics
BY  NEGA
ALBUM  Grave Of The Sacrifice


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Kanji
Added by: Grav3

「これが悪夢なら二度と見ぬよう…」

ああ…五月雨乱れた吐息に絡む湿度 絡まる体に嫌悪の舌這わせて
9歳8ヶ月早過ぎた初夜の血が 今でも記憶に染み付いて離れない

ゆらめく思春期身体は既に汚れ 愛の無い戯れ腐った紙に変えて
麻痺した感覚自分を愛すことが分からない…理解らない…傷跡が増えてゆく

誰か私を愛して…

Why am I made dirty?

繰り返す嘔吐自傷 理由の無い自己嫌悪 暗い部屋蹲る 五月蠅過ぎる沈黙に
鳴り止まない耳鳴りに塞いでたフラッシュバック
トラウマ初夜の記憶 汚れ過ぎた身体に自己哀
排卵に寄生する嫌悪的な精液と「 」 身籠った犠牲の種孕んだ子憎悪かな
ぶり返す嘔吐自傷 お腹の子に自己嫌悪 掻き出した痛みさえ今ではもう…

途切れた記憶を重ねた悪夢なら起こして まだ繰り返す夜に
千切れた痛みはこの子の私への憎悪 ただ許して…

不安に震えた夜 寂しさに抱かれ縋る 初めての恋 初めての温もり
私貴方に恋をした それが愛だと思ったの 何度も貴方に抱かれた 唯一の安らぎ
でも貴方に愛はなかった 私は玩具だった やがて貴方に飼われるの
複数の笑い声 暗闇の中 何度も何度も何度も何度も犯される
止まない陵辱の雨 監禁と羞恥 貴方が誰かさえ分からない
口にアレ銜え 性器に異物 失禁と火傷 膿みだした臭いと憎悪

ねえ…許して…

繰り返す輪姦と 理由の無い自己嫌悪 暗い部屋吊るされる 五月蠅過ぎる笑い声
鳴り止まない耳鳴りと貴方の声フラッシュバック
トラウマと初夜の記憶 犯された身体に自己哀
体内に蠢いた嫌悪的な精液と「 」 血に混じる愛液と失禁に憎悪かな
ぶり返す嘔吐火傷 膿の臭い自己嫌悪 吐き出した痛みさえ今ではもう…

途切れた記憶を重ねた悪夢なら起こして まだ繰り返す夜に
千切れた痛みはあの子の私への憎悪 ただ許して…許して…
殺がれた理性は義父に汚されたこの身 まだ愛せない…愛せない…
崩れた心に貴方は傷跡抉って ただ犯して…犯して…

「全ては現実 貴様の罪 我が喰らうことなど出来ぬ」

Credits: http://hiphopvomit.blogspot.com/2018/07/nega-baku-kono-akumu-kurai-tamae.html


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Romaji
Added by: DokiDokiRingo

"Kore ga akumu nara nido to minu you... "

Aa... Samidare midare ta toiki ni karamu shitsudo karamaru karada ni ken-o no shita hawasete
Kyuu sai hachi kagetsu haya sugita syoya no chi ga ima demo kioku ni shimi tsuite hanare nai

Yurameku shisyuki karada wa sudeni kegare ai no nai tawamure kusatte kami ni kaete
Mahishita kankaku jibun wo aisu koto ga wakara nai... Wakara nai...
Kizuato ga fuete yuku

Dare ka watashi wo aishita...

Why am I made dirty ?

Kurikaesu outo jisyou riyuu no nai jikoken-o kurai heya uzukumaru sabae sugiru chinmoku ni
Nari yamanai miminari ni husaide ta furassyubakku
Torauma to syoya no kioku kegare sugita karada ni jikoai
Hairan ni kisei suru ken-o teki na seieki to midomotta gisei no syu haranda ko zouo kana
Furikaesu outo jishyou onaka no ko ni jikoken-o kakidashita itami sae ima dewa mou...

Togireta kioku wo kasaneta yume nara okoshite mada kurikaesu yo ni
Chigireta itami wa kono ko no watashihe no zouo tada yurushite...

Fuan ni furueta yo sabishisa ni dakare sugaru hajimete no koi hajimete no nukumori
Watashi anata ni koi wo shita sore ga ai dato omoittano nandomo anata ni dakareta yuiitsu no yasuragi
Demo anata ni ai wa nakatta watashi wa omocya datta yagate anata ni kawareru no
Fukusuu no waraigoe kurayami no naka nandomo nandomo nandomo nandomo okasareru
Yamanai ryoujyoku no ame kanjin to syuuchi anata ga dareka sae wakara nai
Kuchi ni are kuwae seiki ni ibutsu shikkin to yakedo umidashita kusai to zouo

Nee... Yurushite...

Kurikaesu rinkan to riyuu no nai jikoken-o kurai heya tsirusareru sabae sugiru waraigoe
Nari yamanai miminari to anata no koe furassyubakku
Torauma to syoya no kioku okasareta karada ni jikoai
Tainai ni ugomeita ken-o teki na seieki to chi ni majiru aieki to shikkin ni zouo kana
Furikaesu outo yakedo umi no kusai jikoken-o hakidashita itami sae ima dewa mou...

Togireta kioku wo kasaneta yume nara okoshite mada kurikaesu yo ni
Chigireta itami wa ano ko no watashihe no zouo tada yurushite... Yurushite...
Sogareta risei wa anata ni kegasareta kono mi mada aise nai... Aise nai...
Kuzureta kokoro ni anata wa kizuato egutte tada okashite... Okashite...

"Subete wa ima kisama no tsumi waga kurau koto nado dekinu"

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Translation
Added by: Grav3

"If this is a nightmare, let it be that I won't see it again..."

Ah... the entangled moisture of the breath agitated by the early summer rain
The nightmare's tongue trails up the tangled bodies
It was 9 years and 8 months too early for blood of the wedding night
It's even now painted in my memories and won't disappear

The luminous adolescent body is already dirty
Turned into a loveless, only-for-fun, rotten paper
I don't know how to love myself that has numb senses... I don't know... The scars are multiplying

Someone, please, love me...

Why am I made dirty?

Repeated vomiting of self-harm, meaningless self-hatred, cowering in the dark room, the silence is too loud
Flashback to me covering my ears because of the nonstop buzzing in them
Memories of the traumatic wedding night, feeling self-pity over my all too dirty body
The repulsive semen and " " leeching on the ovulation
Maybe the hatred is because of the child swollen with seed's conceived sacrifice?
Relapse of the vomiting self-harm, self-hatred because of the child inside me, even as for the scraped out pain, it's now already...

Wake me up if the nightmares of broken memories overlap, in the even now repeating nights
The torn apart pain is this hatred aimed at me that is a child, just forgive me, please...

Night of shivering in unease, getting tightly embraced by the loneliness, my first love, my first warmth
I loved you, I thought that was love, I was repeatedly held by you, my one ease
But you had no love for me, I was a toy, and before long I was kept as your pet
Multiple laughing voices in the darkness, getting violated over, and over, and over, and over again
Nonstop rain of rape, in the imprisonment and shame, I don't even know which one is you
That thing inserted in my mouth, foreign object in my sexual organs, incontinence and burns, the festered ill-scented hatred

hey...forgive me, please...

Repeated gangrape and meaningless self-hatred, getting hanged in the dark room, the laughing voices are too loud
Flashback to the nonstop buzzing in my ears and your voice
Memories of the traumatic wedding night, feeling self-pity over the violated body
The hateful semen and " " slithering in my body, perhaps I hate my blood being mixed with vaginal secretions and incontinence
Relapse of the vomiting of burns, festering ill-scented self-hatred, even the thrown up pain is now already...

Wake me up if the nightmares of broken memories overlap, in the even now repeating nights
The torn apart pain is that hatred aimed at me that is a child, just forgive me, please... forgive me, please...
What weakened my reason was this body being violated by my foster father, I still can't love yet... I can't love...
You gouge out scars in my shattered heart, just violate me... violate me...

"Everything is true, your sin, I can't endure it."

Credits: Grav3


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