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DECADANCE-Counting Goats…if I can't be yours- Lyrics
BY  MEJIBRAY
ALBUM  SM


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Kanji
Added by: Bellasmatte

「希死念慮」抱き続けた
垂れ流しの涙と“訳”
善か悪、感情のコントロールが消えてゆく

告げられた小さな言葉
脳内はバランスを崩し
衝動的欲求がアイデンティティを迷子に・・・
目を閉じて数えてる
“君への愛は何日目?”
捨てられる・・・
殺される・・・
“どうせ一人になるのさ”

Disorderly...Counting Goats
Sacrifice...if I can't be yours

白と黒が切り替えの脳
飛び回る蝶はまばたき切断
妄想と現実の狭間
依存した今と幸の小部屋
捨てられると恐怖する現実
浴びる現実逃避の錠剤に問う
求める、君へ殺してくれと・・・
見えなくなるならば消えてやろうと

DECADANCE
壊れてゆくこの身体と精神さえも
いつか君の形になる
DECADANCE
逸脱された本能とダンスを踊る
if I can't be yours
闇へとCounting Goats

Disorderly...Counting Goats
Sacrifice...if I can't be yours

閉ざし続ける現実へ問う
甘い声と安らぎに笑みを
切り裂いた過去の過ち
“後何_年・・・”と涙と不安抱え
鏡越しの退廃は現実的で
終幕を想像しては雑音
告げる、君へ死にますと・・・
目の前で記憶に残ろうと
ただ守られたいだけなんです
ただ見つめて欲しいだけなんです
ただ不安なだけなんです
精神のバランスがボロボロで
雨が降ってた朝だったり
くるくると舞う煙だったり
投げて壊れたモノだったり
涙する君が愛しいの・・・

DECADANCE
壊れてゆくこの身体と精神さえも
いつか君の形になる
DECADANCE
逸脱された本能とダンスを踊る
if I can't be yours...
空は今日もミドリ色で
決して溶け合う事はない
いつか混ざり合えるならば
闇へとCounting Goats

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Romaji
Added by: Bellasmatte

"kishinenryo" idakitsudzuketa
tarenagashi no namida to "wake"
zen ka aku, kanjou no KONTORO-RU ga kieteyuku

tsugerareta chiisa na kotoba
nounai wa BARANSU o kuzushi
shoudouteki yokkyuu ga AIDENTITI o maigo ni...
me o tojite kazoeteru
"kimi e no ai wa nannichime?"
suterareru...
korosareru...
"douse hitori ni naru no sa"

Disorderly... Counting Goats
Sacrifice... if I can't be yours

shiro to kuro ga kirikae no nou
tobimawaru chou wa mabataki setsudan
mousou to genjitsu no hazama
izon shita ima to sachi no koheya
suterareru to kyoufu suru genjitsu
abiru genjitsu touhi no jouzai ni to'u
motomeru, kimi e koroshite kure to...
mienaku naru naraba kiete yarou to

DECADANCE
kowareteyuku kono karada to seishin sae mo
itsuka kimi no katachi ni naru
DECADANCE
itsudatsu sareta honnou to DANSU o odoru
if I can't be yours
yami e to Counting Goats

Disorderly... Counting Goats
Sacrifice... if I can't be yours

tozashitsudzukeru genjitsu e to'u
amai koe to yasuragi ni emi o
kirisaita kako no ayamachi
"ato nannen..." to namida to fuan kakae
kagamigoshi no taihai wa genjitsuteki de
shuumaku o souzou shite wa zatsuon
tsugeru, kimi e shinimasu to...
me no mae de kioku ni nokorou to

Disorderly... Counting Goats
Sacrifice... if I can't be yours

tada mamoraretai dake nan desu
tada mitsumete hoshii dake nan desu
tada fuan na dake nan desu
seishin no BARANSU ga BOROBORO de
ame ga futteta asa dattari
kurukuru to mau kemuri dattari
nagete kowareta MONO dattari
namida suru kimi ga itoshii no...

DECADANCE
kowareteyuku kono karada to seishin sae mo
itsuka kimi no katachi ni naru
DECADANCE
itsudatsu sareta honnou to DANSU o odoru
if I can't be yours...
sora wa kyou mo MIDORIIRO de
kesshite tokeau koto wa nai
itsuka mazariaeru naraba
oware Counting Goats

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Translation
Added by: KumikoMichiyo

I kept on having “suicidal ideations”
Unstoppable tears and “reason,”
Good or bad, my emotional control is disappearing

I was informed with simple words
That as my brain destroys its balance,
Impulsive desires make my identity lose its way
I count with my eyes closed
“What day is it that I’ve harboured this love for you?”
I can be abandoned…
I can be killed…
“I’ll be alone either way”

Disorderly…Counting Goats
Sacrifice…if I can’t be yours

White and black are flipped around in my mind
The butterfly flying about rips apart in a flash
In-between delusions and reality,
There are the small room of happiness and the addicted present
When I’m abandoned, a frightening reality awaits me
I ask the escapist drugs that are washing over me
I ask of you, to kill me…
If I become unable to see you, I’ll disappear

DECADANCE
My body that’s breaking down and this very mind too,
Will someday come to be like you
DECADANCE
I dance with an instinct that’s been deviated
if I can’t be yours
Counting Goats into the darkness

Disorderly…Counting Goats
Sacrifice…if I can’t be yours

I ask of the reality that I keep shut away
For smiles in peace and a sweet voice
My past mistakes are all torn up
I fight anxiety and tears and “some _ more years…”
And the decadence in the mirror looks realistic
Picturing an end to all this is a hindrance
I inform you, that I will die…
That right before your eyes, I’ll turn into a mere memory
I want only to be able to protect you
I want only for you to look at me
I am just anxious
My mental balance would get worn out and
There were mornings when the rain would fall
And smoke that would curl up in the air
And things I kicked and broke
You were so lovely when you cried…

DECADANCE
My body that’s breaking down and this very mind too,
Will someday come to be like you
DECADANCE
I dance with an instinct that’s been deviated
if I can’t be yours…
The sky is still green today
It will never fade away
If someday it is able to blend in with others,
Counting Goats into the darkness


_________
Tsuzuku said (in the interview for this single) that he wrote this song on a day when he thought about killing himself, but instead decided to die only by writing these lyrics.
The whole “counting goats” thing is indeed what everyone thought, counting goats instead of sheep before sleep. Goats have long been associated with various devil figures, so that’s why.

Credits: http://heresiarchy.tumblr.com/post/95946375552/mejibray-decadance-lyrics-transla


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