Culture difference. is it not possible?

38 posts  ·  created 8yr ago by TYS  ·  last post 3yr ago
Back  |  Forums    First help by dating and love problems    Culture difference. is it not possible?

TYS
8yr ago
995 jpops
permalink my suitor is a korean who is studying in our country. We had mutual understanding for one week, but one week after he did not communicated with me.. i tried to wait for his reply but nothing happened.

when i asked for my korean friend about this, he simply said. "forget about him" "i have heard alot of korean-fil relationship and its all not good"~~~ and so, i believe him for that. he's a good friend of mine and i consider him my older brother.

well, i will leave you a question of: its it possible for two people to be a couple/Lovers who have different culture?
T.T

JustIronic
8yr ago
1,074 jpops
permalink there are lots of couples from different cultures.


just need to compromise.

LovelessHero
8yr ago
6,083 jpops
permalink
Quote by JustIronic
there are lots of couples from different cultures.


just need to compromise.


yes, it's also important to respect your partner's culture

i know it was strange for me getting acquainted with my girlfriend's parents who were very traditional chinese

but we made it :D

TYS
8yr ago
995 jpops
permalink
Quote by LovelessHero
[Quote by JustIronic]

yes, it's also important to respect your partner's culture

i know it was strange for me getting acquainted with my girlfriend's parents who were very traditional chinese

but we made it :D


WOAH! amazing!~~ ill take note of that!

kaspars115
8yr ago
1,204 jpops
permalink [i]Well, i suppose that it could be hard. The question is: What kind of cultures are trying to be together? If something the opposite and very different, then i suppose it can be hard, BUT! What i think is that culture isnt a thing that could say No to a relationship. What matters is how much do you like the person and after that, how much do you love him. If your love, will be strong, together you'll be able to survive everything! :) In such cases, i suppose that parents gives the biggest problems. They could be such people that dont like each other cultures or something... Well, it can be like that... I'm not writing nonsence here! xD
Anyway, you should try how everything will work out. For some people culture is a very serious things to which they look very seriously at :) I hope that this helped you even for a bit! :)
[/i]

raruto
8yr ago
403 jpops
permalink well i am going to tell you my experience, i had two girlfriends, obviously not at the same time jajajaja , but both of them are christian, i mean, you maybe think, and what about that?, well i do not like to much that stuffs or talk about that... well, the point is that when we were couple, well we have a lot of problems.. about that i were not believe in good or i were not part of her religion.. things like that... maybe you think and What one thing has to do with the other? well... a lot... cause this is an example like culture... ok, so ... if you and he or she are decided to respect ourselves as you are well i think there is no problem but if you are not.. well its better stop... that is my opinion

kahlan
8yr ago
6,014 jpops
permalink culture difference is really not different from any difference of opinion you may have about any given subject. Two people in a relationship may have lots of different opinions about many things regardless of things like cultural background, upbringing etc etc...

the point is that if the two people involved want to be together then they will find a way to be together, they will be understanding and respectful of one another, and there may need to be compromise, but these things surely must be a given in a relationsip?

i know people who come from different cultural backgrounds and their relationships work, because they want to make it work, because they are prepared to work at it, because relationships need effort

ChunSungYoun
8yr ago
402 jpops
permalink I know this has already been said but yes it is possible for two different cultures to be in a relationship. It's all a matter of respecting the other person's culture. One thing that I have found helpful with all of my girlfriends is learning their culture and teaching them mine.

FriedRiceGurl
8yr ago
7,005 jpops
permalink Aww!!! I have a best friend that had the same exact problem.. She was Filipino and she fell in love with this Korean boy but her parents disagreed due to cultural differences.. But the boy was sweet and kind and earned trust from her parents and they became surprisingly.. not disagreeing about the culture difference. It's funny how they look now.. married.. two kids.. living in Manila!! :) I see her every year.. she and her family always gets beautiful every day. But yes I do believe their is hope.. not just because of my friend, but because strangely.. I can't find my self attracted to the same ethnicity as I am. I am white/ American.. and I just feel more attracted to Asian people or Hispanic people. I do not know what's up with that.. but Lol. I am. My parents STRONGLY disapprove of me having any relationship someone of the opposite ethnicity. I can't stand it.. it's almost like their racist and I can't stand that. But you think I worry about them or anyone else? I go for who I want and Love.. right now I am in happy, healthy relationship with this amazingly gorgeous Japanese boy. My parents finally turned their brains on and seen that the relationship between two cultures was no big deal and no big difference and they finally approved. But really.. I think any relationship can work if you put effort, and love into it!! :D Don't worry.. go for that Korean man. Love him with all your heart. I wish your future relationship good luck!! ;)

sanemonkey
8yr ago
374 jpops
permalink Yes it's possible my step mom is Filipino and my dad is American and have been married for 7 years (and had a long distance relationship) now and it seems to work very well for them. But you would need to understand the person and be open to new ideas and them too.

My gf is Chinese and I'm American but we make it work (been together for almost 10 months) I try to be open for new things and ideas and so does she and it's working well. lol (:
And my twin has a Korean bf and it's working well for her and they have been together for over a year now but known each other for I think 2 years. (:

See it's possible!! :D[edit]Last edit by sanemonkey on Tuesday 08 Feb, 2011 at 23:48 +2.3%[/edit][edit]Last edit by sanemonkey on Tuesday 08 Feb, 2011 at 23:41 +7.8%[/edit]

Yuffinara
7yr ago
2,566 jpops
permalink If you want the truth, it'll definitely work out. There's nothing wrong with that really. Forget what your Korean friend said, it'll work out fine.

jaden1992
7yr ago
276,260 jpops
permalink Of course its possible, anything is possible, cultural differences should not make you feel any different.

ahiruko
7yr ago
1,856 jpops
permalink is possible but you really need to prepare yourself because it'll be really hard but in the end if you both really love each other any hardship is all worth it :) x

Asia1
6yr ago
207,821 jpops
permalink Possible if people are ready to compromise, if not - there is no love between them or one of them, only affection. Real love is forgiving and is ready to find any ways to be together. Didn't work for me because the guy wasn't ready to compromise, but I was. So, all is in your hands.

YukiLee
6yr ago
2,032 jpops
permalink It's possible. But it's hard, mostly for people with different religions.
And I think a mixed couple with an asian is one of the hardest too because in Asia they're not completely open to this kind of things yet. I'm sure in the future they will be but for the moment it's not well received.

Ypu just have to work harder than for a normal couple and don't give up easily.

milktealover89
6yr ago
54,780 jpops
permalink Of course it's possible, it's just something the both of you have to work through together. It can be difficult, but as long as you understand and are open-minded to learning their culture (and vice versa) then it'll be fine.

Parents on the other hand might be a little tougher. I'm sure most of them would want their child to be with someone of the same culture because that's just easier, especially with communication, but in the end it's about you and your boyfriend/girlfriend and how much you want to make it work.

I'm Vietnamese-American and my boyfriend is Korean (plus, he's Christian and I'm not) The only issue we've ever had with cultural differences is that his mom preferred him to be with a Korean girl, but she's okay with me now. His dad didn't care at all haha. Actually, he preferred that my boyfriend was with an American girl like me :3

ElleDion84
6yr ago
1,216 jpops
permalink Hrmm old topic but what the hey. xD;

Why hault everything because your friend said so?? Even if he's like an older brother, he's not dating him. At least ask that guy in person (or phone or whatever) as to why he stopped talking to you. Just stopping entirely, even after both of you liking each other is crap. Take it slow as friends, whatever. I'm biased since I like closure. xD;

Aside from different culture clashes, there's also how the two people are. Will they accept who you are without their family's beliefs clouding their judgment? It is possible for people from different cultures to come together, but that doesn't mean it's any easier, relationship-wise. I know it too well because my better-half's from China (uh, literally xD), and we've butt heads several times due to different views and miscommunication (English not being his first language and I was anti-social xD; ), but it can work when the both of you want to be together and work for it.

If it's only one person, then sorry to say it wasn't meant to be.

YamashitaMaki
6yr ago
4,457 jpops
permalink There is no such thing like IMPOSSIBLE if we're talking about LOVE here.

Asia1
6yr ago
207,821 jpops
permalink Totally!

Drey
6yr ago
18,664 jpops
permalink Simply and really true^_^!

Daelyn
6yr ago
1,407 jpops
permalink I'm wondering the same thing... because I'm white and the guy I like is Japanese-Australian (as in, born here but has Japanese parents) and seems to not care about nationality... my parents are all "As long as you're happy" but I'm worried about his family... do THEY not want him to go out with a white girl? (despite the fact I like his family's culture more than mine and can speak his background language)

But I guess all that matters is that the two of you love each other, because love overcomes all barriers, right?

xldaretolook
6yr ago
47,232 jpops
permalink I think it is possible for many reasons.

kide777
6yr ago
76 jpops
permalink Not only possible to be a couple. My friend is actually married with a woman from a whole different world. He's Korean (from Korea) and married with a Swede (from Sweden)

You just need to tolerate each others, try to understand each others' cultures and learn to assimilate with it. Oh.. and absolutely you need a real LOVE. ;)

kayanna
6yr ago
4,346 jpops
permalink it's good to have someonewho has a different culture at least you get to learn from each other

darksama
6yr ago
828,218 jpops
permalink culture can change lol
anyway... different culture is not a problem at all.. besides u'll find it fun when u can mix both ur own culture and other's culture...

LyrreChelle
6yr ago
72,824 jpops
permalink now a days, that's not a big deal in a relationship..how ever, some circumstances can't be avoided..then it's up to them to decide

Nightgaze
6yr ago
377,126 jpops
permalink I really don't believe it should~ I believe true love can surpass any barrier including cultural ones~ ^_^ (Isn't that like the cheesiest thing ever? :P)

MBz0rz
5yr ago
198 jpops
permalink Yes, it's possible. Sometimes it's not. It very much depends. I am white and my fiance is Vietnamese; we have been together for 6 years. But let me tell you, it has been a huge struggle at times, mostly due to the cultural differences in his family. Filial piety and family harmony is very much valued and if you disrupt that, you can be disowned. His parents hate me and want nothing to do with me. I watch him get hurt over and over by his parents because they get so angry at him for continuing to see me (we live together now too) after they tell him not to. He is an adult, but it doesn't matter how old you are in their traditional culture; you respect and obey your parents whether you're 15 or 35. If you do not, you're a disgrace to them. Needless to say, they are not coming to the wedding.

In the end he made his own choice and risked losing his parents forever to stay with me. The guilt eats at me sometimes too.

However, I have also read/seen far too often where those in a similar relationship end up breaking up because the one person does not want to disobey/disappoint their parents. In my Western individualistic society, it is hard for us to understand and respect such decisions. Even my own brother in-law called my fiance a coward/mama's boy at times.

Interracial/cultural relationships can be a struggle at times and it takes a lot of patience, compromise, and sometimes sacrifice. You just have to look into yourself to see if you are willing to deal with that.

Chiaki0978
5yr ago
14,719 jpops
permalink well, for me, my first boyfriend, we only lasted like 2 and a half weeks.
He's american and im korean. and I'm a complete FOB. I dont really listen to any american music or watch any american shows anymore. i used to when i was a kid, its how i learned english. but these days, im only into stuff from korea and japan....
We just didn't really clash well, he liked his stuff and i like mine, we werent crazy about each other's music interest and foods.

my boyfriend right now loves asian things. he loves pandas and pokemon to death lol
he's also american and he's the typical "I LOVE SPORTS" kind of guy.
But he loves chinese food and watching pokemon/playing games like kirby and pokemon...
and we're doing great right now! :)
last week was our 3 month anniversary and still going strong!

so in my case, it was whether or not we had the same interests. i dont think race or culture has a HUGE impact. on some people it might but not for everyone. and if u love the person enough, things like that dont really matter.

Nightgaze
5yr ago
377,126 jpops
permalink Race totally doesn't matter! My girlfriend is Japanese and I'm Canadian and we're deeply in love with each other! So it really doesn't matter! :D

stefyap
5yr ago
346,658 jpops
permalink REMOVED - SPAM

HimeMurasaki
3yr ago
3,908 jpops
permalink I think it depends more on the individuals than the cultures themselves. There are people from the same country who are incompatible, in the same way there are people from different countries who have been married for years and have a wonderful relationship. As long as you are close and have good communication, and similar views, I think the relationship is possible. But only fate can decide.

Nightgaze
3yr ago
377,126 jpops
permalink It's 2015 I don't think racial issues should get in between two people who love each other

Xinyang
3yr ago
449 jpops
permalink I think it is possible, but it will be difficult. Even with the korean culture, their parents look down upon interracial couples.

pronzite
3yr ago
38,773 jpops
permalink It was[size=60] POSSIBLE[/size] dear.
We live in this world born in various ethnicity and culture to know each other and love each other. There's no wrong in this kind of relationship. Perhaps that man was not that much good but there's lot out there worth your time and care. :)

BluejayHaurt
3yr ago
8,327 jpops
permalink In the beginning, it worked for my parents. My dad was Swedish and my mom was American, and they had totally different opinions in things, but they still got married :)

ensorcelledAubade
3yr ago
27,445 jpops
permalink Anything is possible! It will work for some, others maybe not so much

tsubasayamada
3yr ago
57,000 jpops
permalink I think it is possible. Even if the two cultures have clashing, as long as the couple works the differences out. And it would be so cool to teach your kids so many different languages. Because contrary to the belief of some, kids are actually able to pick up many different languages and it won't hinder their language abilities at all!


Back  |  Forums    First help by dating and love problems    Culture difference. is it not possible?
JpopAsia   © 2018             Privacy             Terms            
By continuing to browse our site you agree to our use of cookies, Updated Privacy Policy 2.01 and Terms of Service